Some align themselves with the thinking that the earlier you tell someone, the less it will hurt you if that person cannot picture themselves with a cancer survivor.
Even those who follow this school of thought advise waiting several dates before exposing the less gleaming aspects of your dating resume.
I told him I used to be shier than I am now, that I haven’t ever worked in an environment conducive to meeting single men, and then I put it all out there, the single most pertinent reason for my absence from the dating scene: I’m a two-time cancer survivor.
If your cancer turns out to be a deal breaker, hopefully you have not gotten too attached to him or her.” Still, I know from listening to others in my support group that some people wait much longer, sometimes months to bring up “the big C”, especially if a fair amount of time has passed since their treatment.
Whenever someone brought up the topic of dating after cancer in my young adult support group, I admit that I only half listened. “I’m not shy about sharing my cancer experience.” Here I am now, older, wiser and a little bit lost.
Since my group doesn’t meet for several more weeks, I delved into the world of on-line cancer support.
First I visited forums where cancer patients and their significant others discussed the challenges of dating after cancer.
As it turns out, men and women both struggle with identifying the best time to tell a new love interest about their cancer history.
Julie blogs about her personal experience with leukemia and life from a patient’s perspective. She is a race walker, a dog lover, and a dedicated #bearcam watcher. I’m 32, I’m decent looking, I have a job I enjoy and family and friends I love.My motto is “go with the flow”…well, more specifically, my e-mail tagline is “When you come to a fork in the road, take it” (Yogi Berra). I ended up telling a guy over a text last night that I’m a two-time cancer survivor.In fact, Kairol Rosenthal writes in that date number four is the rule, unless your cancer is visible or you have a “tell-all personality”: “Why reveal your cancer on the first or second date to someone you don’t know, don’t trust, and may not see again?By the fourth date you may know if you want to continue seeing the other person.In my defense, he had asked me why I was still single if I’ve lived in this area my entire life.He asked this in a teasing way, but when I read it, my heart sank.